Lessons Learned from "Mindless" Entertainment

Last night my husband and I indulged in some seemingly “mindless” entertainment.  We stopped by the video store and picked up two comedies to sit and watch, whiling away the evening.  One of them was The Invention of Lying staring Ricky Gervais.  It’s a soft, sweet little romantic comedy, not side-splitting humor.  The story takes place in a world where no one is capable of lying.  Everyone always tells the truth, until one day a writer (Gervais) discovers “something that is not” coming out of his mouth and he decides to use this new found ability to lie for personal gain.  It would be largely forgettable except that as I watched I realized the movie highlights three profound life lessons. 

1) Always tell the truth – In the movie, as in real life, every lie that is told has to be remembered and backed up with other lies.  Often the character’s fabrications are well intentioned – as when, to ease his dying mother’s anxiety, he tells her that she will go to a wonderful place when she dies.  She will have a mansion and all the people she loves will be there with her. No one in this movie world had ever heard of Heaven, and therefore all believe that after death there is just "eternal nothingness."  The doctor and nurses in the room  believe him unconditionally, as does the rest of the world, and they want to know more about the “after place.”  Naturally it snowballs on him (because no one truly knows everything about Heaven and/or the afterlife), with comic results.  So it is in real life.  Even well-intentioned falsehoods compromise our integrity.  When you tell a lie, you have to remember what you told to whom, and perpetuate the fabrication.  That just takes too much gray matter and invariably the truth comes out.  When it does, it's profoundly difficult to rebuild any credibility.  Always tell the truth.

2) Remember the “Thumper Rule” – Much of the humor we found in the movie came in the form of the true, but often unkind things that came out of the character’s mouths.  Because the people in this fictional world are incapable of lying they say whatever they are thinking and/or feeling, which is often negative.  From a viewer’s standpoint, it was funny. (I especially liked the name blazoned across the top of the old-folk’s home, “A sad place where hopeless old people live.”)  Apparently no one in this world has heard of the Thumper Rule (so dubbed because the first time I heard it was out of the mouth of Thumper in the movie Bambi).  “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”  In the real world we are all wise to remember the Thumper Rule and avoid saying something hurtful or negative.

3) Everyone is more than what they appear on the outside – The writer’s love interest in the movie is portrayed by Jennifer Garner.  For much of the movie she comes off as quite shallow, as she pursues her perfect genetic match so she can have genetically perfect children.  While Gervais' character is her best friend, and she finds him fun to be with, she outright rejects him as a potential husband and mate solely on the basis of his looks, fearing (in her words) “short, fat children with stubby noses.”    For that reason she refuses to allow herself to see that being with him makes her happy.  Unfortunately most of the characters are focused on such external characteristics.  The writer tries to point out the other side, the internal characteristics of people to broaden her vision.  Eventually, of course, she has an epiphany and decides that he is all she wants and needs and they live happily ever after.  In real life it is all too easy for us to focus on the external.  That might be someone’s good-looks, a well-formed physique, the size of one’s bank account or other superficial factors. What REALLY matters is what’s on the inside, someone’s character and how they decide to utilize that to serve other people.

These three lessons highlight characteristics of High Road thinking.

• Always tell the truth - it is easier, and the right thing to do.  The truth never changes.
• Throughout any conversation, continually ask yourself, "Is what I'm about to say true, kind and necessary."  That is a good barometer for the "Thumper Rule."
• Always look deeper than surface level for the inner beauty that we all possess.  Look for the gifts that are unique in each and every person.

Following these three rules will give you a leg up to the High Road and, ultimately, to success.