I had a very interesting “small world” encounter this week as I was traveling and presenting. In Temple, TX I was approached by a woman during a break late in the afternoon. This gal had been a real spark plug in the room. She had solid eye contact, was often nodding in agreement, laughing out-loud and asking insightful questions. We appeared to be on a similar wave length. She wanted to share with me a texting exchange she had that day.
After the opening session she had sent a text to a co-worker that read, “learning lots - feel smarter already!” The response she received back read, “w/e (whatever) you had a lot to learn.”
She thought this was hysterical, coming as it was from someone who had been in my session the day before in a different city and had found the day to be a “waste of her time.”
“One of your co-workers was in my session yesterday?” I asked. “Wow, what a small world. The fact that she didn’t get anything out of it is not a good sign… What’s her name? Maybe I remember her.”
She shared the co-worker’s name with me, and I did indeed remember her. This person had sat, stone-faced all day - it almost seemed she was working aggressively to not show any expression. She made no eye contact with me, took no notes and offered no input on the brainstorming exercises. Sensing that I wasn't reaching her, I approached her at break and asked if there was anything specific that I could cover in more depth for her. “No. I’m fine,” was the response.
“Oooh, I DO remember her,” I told my Temple participant. “I don’t think she 'got' me at all. I hope the content will be helpful for her even if she didn’t care for my delivery style.”
"She doesn't ‘get’ ANYONE. She could be listening to Oprah Winfrey or Mahatma Gandhi and still not 'get' anything - so don't take it personally. I think you're great and I'm learning a lot."
It’s very possible that my delivery style was not her cup of tea - and yet, based upon the return text (“you had a lot to learn.”), it's more probable that the co-worker did not believe she had anything yet to learn. The material content and the delivery were the same in each city. The only thing that changed was the willingness of the participant to learn. One was open to growth and expanded ideas, the other was not.
I think it is Frank Zappa who originally said, “The mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work if it’s not open.”
Once we stop learning we start dying. Don't find yourself in the same position as my energetic participant's co-worker. Make sure that your mind is always open to new thoughts, new ideas and new ways of doing something or viewing something.
High Road challenge for the day: Learn something new today. Ask a mentor an open-ended question about a recent news item that has you confused. Read a section of the newspaper you have never looked at before. Pick up a non-fiction book about someone you admire. Every day there is something new to learn and someone new to learn from. An open parachute could save your life in the right circumstances. An open mind just may do the same.
Monday, March 8, 2010
Open Your Parachute
Labels:
attitude,
choice,
clarity,
empathy,
High Road,
leadership,
learning,
mind,
parachute,
sharpen the saw,
willingness
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Excellent comments, and great insight! I will say that one must have an open mind to new ideas and new experiences. In that sense I agree with you completely. That being said, one always approaches anything new with a healthy bit of skepticism and reserves judgment until the appropriate time. Also, most people bring a unique foundation to the party when viewing something new, and that means each person will view it differently (i.e. 5 blind men and the elephant).
ReplyDeleteI always try to keep an open mind, but no so open my brains fall out....;-P
Mark
I attended your seminar in NYC yesterday, the 12th. I had to leave before the seminar ended. I read your blog and understand know why I was conflicted about your peppy style. I attended a similar seminar a couple of years ago and it was not interactive. I was bothered that a few attendees interrupted your flow of information so many times and it seemed that you were giving them individual attention. That's ok. I understand now that you are in recovery. You are kind and very respectful. I know you beleive in a Higher Power. I am in recovery also. I wish I had given you all E's. At the time I filled out the evaluation form, I was jaded and felt that maybe I would just get two hours of something new. I will continue to follow your blog and am going to buy your book.
ReplyDeleteSincere good wishes to you and your family.
A NYC attendee.
I meant now instead of know. I was busy setting up an account to be able to blog.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for that. If I am not mistaken, you were in the second row on the right. (Am I right?) I also know who you are referring to as far as the individual attention. I try to keep it as balanced as possible and control those participants who inadvertently take over the room. Sometimes I am more successful than others. None-the-less, I believe we are all placed where we need to be, when we need to be there, to hear what we need to hear - and I think she was in there with us for a reason. I so appreciate hearing from you and hope that we can keep in touch.
ReplyDeleteHugs from the High Road
Lauren